Published on 3rd June 2016 by Roya
The Studant
The Studant, illustrated by Lynda Richardson

The student genus is very diverse, with each species possessing unique abilities that distinguish themselves from the crowd. Some rely upon natural intelligence, while others employ advanced communication skills or supreme composure under pressure in order to survive.

However, few species are as gifted as the Studants, whose advantage trumps almost all competitors. And what is this innate ability? The answer is simple:  sheer unrelenting willpower.

Perseverants is key

Studants, are a driven species. With a greater capacity to endure than diamonds or cockroaches (or worse – diamond cockroaches), the Studant can work for unfathomable lengths of time, maintaining energy and focus where almost all other species would succumb to the temptation of going home and relaxing.

This ability enables the species to learn an immense volume of information – vital for end-of-year examinations, meaning members of the species are generally the highest achievers among the entire student genus.

Pedantic traits

Many  healthcare habitat expeditions are to desolate, barren wards, with med students spending a great deal of time doing very little. These tedium levels would be sufficient to drive away any other species, but the Studant is unrelenting. This creature will endure hours of monotony, firm in the belief that their patience will be rewarded.

For many a med student who find’s their patience and energy drained by early afternoon , it can be easy to compare oneself to the formidable Studant, with most comparisons being negative. Your 25 minutes of work before checking Facebook, reading this article and spending an hour playing Tetris, doesn’t hold up well against the Studant’s 5 hour marathon session learning the ins-and-outs of Levodopa (unless you’re really good at Tetris – you don’t need to know that much about Levodopa anyway).

These comparisons can be beneficial, with the Studant’s toils inspiring the less-motivated to buckle down and get work done. However, students and other members of the med student genus must be wary of over-comparison, as this can have damaging effects upon psyche and body.

Don’t copy the Studant’s antics… just their notes

The Studant brain is a highly-evolved machine. It eliminated unnecessary organic sentiments like fatigue and boredom, instead filling the empty spaces with extra determination, willpower and just a pinch of anxiety that if they stop working, they will fail catastrophically.

No other brain in existence is adapted this way, and those who subject their unprepared minds to such an arduous challenge risk loss of self confidence, fatigue and burn out. Try to keep up with the Studant, but remain aware of your limits. All work and no play can make an average student’s head explode.

Studants are reliable and ever-present members of the healthcare habitat, so students would be wise to become accustomed to  their presence without being daunted by their awesome endurance. Plus, they make great notes, so it’s always a good idea to keep one close at hand when exam-season comes around.

Uploaded by Eric Richardson on 3 June, 2016


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